A new colour in me
I always teased and make fun of my girlfriend when she cries after watching a show or a movie. I will say to her "ntah apa apa, tu pun nak nangis". As people say, what goes around, comes around. If i know that this particular behaviour is going to bite me later, i will say nothing to her and will only keep my mouth shut.
Actually, i dont know why this happens to me. I never cried just because a show is sad or touching. i will only feel very ’sebak’ and that’s it. no tears will follow.
However, since i live here alone in the UK, this new colour seems to emerge inside of me. Now, i do cry if a show touches my heart. The one thing that i realised is, i will cry if it involves family and relationship. I think it must be due to my current condition, away from my family and my love ( miss her so much).
The show that managed to break the cold heart of mine is definitely EXTREME MAKEOVER , and the EXTREME MAKEOVER : HOME EDITION . The show is really about giving the ‘not so’ fortunate people to look and feel better about themselves. The Extreme team will give these people the look that will change their lives…and this really gives those people a chance to walk on earth with confidence. The other is the home edition, where some people are given the chance to begin a new life with the gift of a new home. The team will built a new gorgeous house for them to start over their lives (after some terrible things happen to their lives before that).
As for me, the part of the show that makes me cry is when after having their makeover, they will be ‘revealed’ to their family/spouse back home in a special occasion organised by the show. This is where my tears will start to drop, especially when they come home and hug their family. If it is a married couple, the person will then be revealed to their spouse, and forgive me, this will make me cry too. In the home edition of extreme makeover, i will cry when these family arrived home and the extreme team revealed them their new house and all the people in the show will start crying, with all the mixed feelings, joy for having a new dream house and grateful for what the extreme team has done for them. As the show becomes emotional with tears, with all of them crying, i am crying too….( what the heck is happening to me….pehal la pulak nih )…i feel so touched that other people will go the extra mile just to give others chances to start over their lives.
I can still remember there was one time i was watching Queer Eye for the Straight Guy, and i cried when i saw the scene where the husband went to his wife and say " i miss you so much"…when that particular scene was on TV, the Fab 5 were crying as well, so you can imagine how touching the moment can be…i cried because i miss my love…….( sekali lagi..ni pesal la pulak…)
My love will laugh to death reading this and will definitely say things back at my face. Yes, i know…i shouldn’t teased her before. I dont know what got into me, but i guess it is due to my lonely life here. i miss everything back home.
Having said that, i still want to stay here and enjoy UK…and i dont want to go home yet….why ? i think i’m still confused….perhaps…can i have both worlds, family, my love and UK? I think i know the answer.
so..what should i do ? enjoy every moments while i’m here and continue missing home. i know that one day i’ll be home again, and at that time i’ll be missing UK….but that’s LIFE right….cant have two nice thing at the same time. have to let go something…
- Iz OUT-
